Growing Older or Maturing

Dad and Ephraim attend the Avatar Symphony

My younger son is a pianist and enjoys the sounds and composition of cinematic scores.  Recently, my husband took him to The Avatar Symphony. As we listened to portions of the performance, my older son made an interesting comment, stating, “I have to remind myself that Aang is the youngest and oldest character in the show.”  What an intriguing dichotomy to be the oldest and youngest person!

Growing up, my sons liked watching The Avatar - the Last Airbender, which centered around a 12-year-old boy named Aang who was raised in a fictional world of Asian cultural influences. Aang is the young Avatar growing up in a community of monks until his village is raided. All life in his community was destroyed, while Aang was saved by a storm that left him frozen in an iceberg for 100 years.  Aang was discovered by two children from another nation who took mercy on him and engrafted Aang into their family.

Aang was predestined to be the next Avatar, a mythical person who controlled the elements of earth, air, water and fire. These children had no idea how their influence with Aang was going to shape and ultimately save their world.  As leaders in our homes, communities, and beyond, we often don’t know the impact of our influence, especially on young leaders.  Aang’s purpose was to keep balance (peace) in the world, ensuring no nation oppressed other kingdoms. During the reign of the previous Avatars, the nations lived with respect and harmony within the boundaries of civility amongst neighboring lands lest they upset the Avatar, who had the power to singlehandedly put down evil to restore harmony by any means necessary.

Aang only had 12 years of teaching as a child.  However, during his iceberg hibernation, he still grew older.  As the challenges of leadership mounted,  he learned he did not mature from childish thinking because he had no teacher or mentor to train him.  Aang epitomizes a person who continues to age but not develop, grow older but not matriculate into maturity.  Aang is 112 years old with the responsibility and pressure of keeping world peace. Yet, he finds he is not equipped for the task without proper leadership development and experienced teachers supporting him in becoming the Avatar he is meant to be.

Isn’t this just like our world? We must remember that our children, coworkers, family members, and leaders may have grown older over time but not necessarily matured into the roles and leadership responsibilities expected of them.  Leaders can find themselves in positions without the character, experience, or emotional development to lead.  You may encounter the mentality of a 12-year-old Avatar trying to demonstrate leadership in environments made for adults who have matured.

How can you recognize the leaders who have grown older but have not matured?

1. Lack of wisdom with consistent display of unbridled restraint

2. Inability to apply strategic foresight or implement plans effectively

3. Habit of devaluing the team around them and lack of concern for people they lead

4. Stir up strife and refuse to listen to wise counsel, instead counting others as opposition or threats - they operate in ignorance and defiance

5. Make accusations or quickly pass blame without taking ownership for mistakes

6. Commend themselves by recognizing by their own value but not the valuable contributions of others

7. Present an air of superiority or “lording over” people instead of leading people towards common goals to better the organization

8. Prideful attitude - they are always right in their own eyes or rationalize poor leadership decisions and behaviors

Aang was the most powerful person on his planet, but he had no idea how to use it properly because he lacked leadership maturity.  Even with good intentions, his missteps caused harm to friends he unintentionally injured. His rash decisions resulted in destructive lashing out on others without cause.  Yet, when he matured, his submission to wise counsel and proper training increased his understanding of his responsibilities and helped him accomplish his purpose.  As leaders, we cannot control all the situations or outcomes we face, but we can control how we lead and respond in the midst of them.  Who are you influencing, and who is influencing you?

Take a moment to reflect on ways you can leverage your sphere of influence today and lead from a place of maturity and wisdom.